Impermanence & Memories

Today is the 10 year anniversary since my mum passed away due to a heart attack at the age of 49. Two weeks prior to that, I had just turned 20 years old and was living in Iceland for the past year when I heard the news. Within two days I was on a flight back home.

 

Partial aerial view of Keflavík, Iceland where I lived for over a year. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

 

Like typical families, I argued with my mum constantly and sadly took her for granted. I always thought she would be there for me, through the best and worst times and I felt like I never needed to worry that she wouldn’t be there for me. During the last year of her life, while I lived in Iceland, we communicated by email and sometimes by phone. Our conversions became meaningful and we hardly argued, if I remember correctly, because phone calls were expensive to waste frivolously and it’s hard to get in an argument with a well-intended email.

Coming back home was hard because this time I knew my mum wouldn’t be there waiting for me.

After studying some of the dharma over the past year, it becomes truth about impermanence when you experience it for yourself. Sometimes we welcome impermanence to put an end to things we don’t like, and other times we hate it for putting an end to the things we love.

 

Buddha taught about impermanence and death. It’s never easy to acknowledge, but we have to accept it, but not forget the memories. (Photo credit: PhotoSolutions)

Upon realizing what is impermanent, we should take the time to appreciate what we have before it is gone. We need to make time for the people that matter most in our lives, because we never know how much time there will be.

Plan for the future, but appreciate today.

I can’t change the arguments I had with my mum or words I wish I could have or should have said when I had the chance, but I have many memories to keep.

If I could say something to my mum today it would be, “Thank you; and I love you.”

In Memory, my Mum – 1953 – 2002

Namaste.