Stress, Worry and Buddha Nature

Worrying does little to resolve problems. It only makes our mental and physical health worsen. I have a tendency to worry a lot sometimes. It becomes like a bad habit and once I start worrying and continue to worry, it becomes a vicious cycle. If there is something that can be done about a situation, then there is no need to worry, right? I meticulously try to plan things out when I worry about things; most of the time it’s about money. Money is the main cause of worry for most people. Money buys us freedom to do things that we want to do and have the things that we want to have, but not having enough or have too many financial obligations creates stress.

To the little beetle on the asian lily, life is so simple and beautiful!

Stress and worry are bad for our hearts, both in a medical and spiritual way. Most of the time there are solutions to our problems, but many times we don’t think there is, mainly because we don’t like the options that are available to us, such as sacrificing lifestyle and comforts or compromising, or simply because we don’t think the solution will yield the best results. But, there are almost always options.

I have been very stressed this past week and making myself sick in the process. Finally, I told myself that I have to break free from stressing myself out. I picked up my copy of Thich Nhat Hanh’s book “Happiness” and started reading it again. It brought me back to the simplicity of being in the moment, reminding me of the benefits of mindfulness and meditation.

thich nhat hanh (Photo credit: tussenpozen)

Finding the time to meditate seems difficult sometimes, but we all have 24 hours every day. However, I sometimes can’t seem to keep my mind still and feel I have to keep it active, or else I feel “guilty” for taking time to not do anything, especially when I’m stressed. But, that is exactly the time when we should meditate! Taking 10 minutes a day won’t take time away from pressing matters. The obligations will still be there waiting, but for 10 minutes they can wait a little longer, and after those 10 minutes, you’ll be able to face them with a better attitude.

We need to stop every day and appreciate beauty around us, or else we will miss it and lose the purpose of our lives: to be happy.

I still need to take things as they come up; rather than worry with anticipation and stress myself out before something has happened. I have had many sleepless nights, and I’m sure my worries have shortened my lifespan ever so slightly. But, I believe that can be reversed.

After a week and a half of stress and worry, I need to return to my Buddha nature. No matter what happens in our lives, in our world, it’s the one place we can always seek refuge in. It’s always inside us, where we can find calmness, peace, simplicity, compassion, kindness and tranquility.

“Even when we have physical hardships, we can be very happy.” – Dalai Lama XIV

Buddha Body and Mind – Lessons Learned for My Better Health

This week has been a tiring week, although most weeks these past few months are tiring. The rheumatologist that I met with again believes that I have fibromyalgia. I have suspected this for at least a month or two and my husband thought I was reading too much on the Internet. I won’t say “I told you so”, because he now knows I was right.

My condition isn’t as bad as some people can experience, and I’m hoping that with some lifestyle and behavioural changes I can maybe prevent it from getting worse. The rheumatologist suggested exercise (which I really do need) and even cognitive behaviour changes. This made me think of solidifying and strengthen my beliefs.

Buddha has taught many lessons on how to help ourselves, we just need to hear!

Buddhism takes away the idea of pitying ourselves and focusing our attention on other sentient beings. When you think of other sentient beings’ greater suffering, our own seems to be smaller in comparison. If we’re in pain, if we can train our mind to focus on something else, we can lessen how much pain we experience (particularly the aches and pains of fibromyalgia).  For example, in my case, if I sit too long doing nothing I can feel the pain moving from one muscle or joint to another muscle or joint. If I concentrate on work or other things, I don’t notice it as much. I definitely find I hurt more on days when I have little work to do compare to days where I’m busy all day. I do hurt more at the end of the day, and that’s when I can relax and take it easy, recovering for the next day.

I need to meditate more. Meditating on compassion for others will help me to be more kind and compassion especially on days where I’m hurting and become irritable from poor sleep and forgetfulness. It’s hard to put on a smile when you feel miserable. But, perhaps by smiling to a friend, we can change our state of mind willingly, not forcefully. The idea is that if we meditate continuously and frequently, these states of mind will become natural like a skilled art. However, when you hurt to sit in any position for longer than five minutes and not really ”do” anything can be difficult, but I need to do so on days when I think I’m able to. If it’s only for five minutes, then it will only be five minutes. In fact, I will actually do that after finishing this entry.

A perfect cushion/zafu to meditate!

Buddhism helps to change our way of thinking. Karma is not just actions, but also thoughts. If I think negatively about myself and my condition, I will feel even worse and not accomplish anything. That would be my karma. If I change my perspective, I change my outcome. We’re all inspired by people who overcome adversity and prove that they can do things. We all have challenges in our lives. Some are successful, some are not, but we all like to hear a story where someone beats the odds or at least tries. We like to help people willing to help themselves or allow us to help. It comes down to our outlook on life. We need to think positively!

My lessons from learning I have fibromyalgia which I am applying to myself:

–          Take care of myself emotionally and physically

–          Eat a well-balanced diet

–          Exercise

–          Take time to relax

–          Take time to read coping techniques for pain, sleep and stress

–          Think positively

–          Meditate more often

These techniques may not work for everyone with fibromyalgia, but it’s my plan. I think they can apply to healthy people too.

So wherever you are and whatever your health is, take care of yourself so you can take care of others. Love yourself and from that you learn to love others.

Have a great weekend everyone!

With Metta,

All Problems are Impermanent and Empty

 

Just as our problems come to life like this flower, yet not as beautiful, they will also disappear.

These past seven days have been interesting and more stressful than I had expected. It started with getting a collection agency letter addressed to me: my name and address, but not my debt. I went to my bank, which is affiliated with the company that issued this “supposed” loan and have been working at the matter to clear this up. I’ve had to talk to a bank manager that suspected fraud, had to fax my story to the creditor, and speak to the collection agency. To make a long story short, it looks like it is a debt for someone with the same name as me. It raises many questions on how this bank institution gets the right to pick my name essentially out of a phone book, put my phone number and address on someone else’s file and then send creditors after me. The more I think about it, it upsets me.

Then I thought of the Dharma; impermanence and emptiness.

These cherry blossoms first bud, then come into fruition, then will disappear come winter. Even problems have seasons, and will come and go.

This banking/creditor situation is definitely a problem to me. As frustrating it is to try to prove that it’s not me, I have to think that this problem will not last forever. This proves the impermanence of the situation. It will be resolved and life will return to the way it was before it happened. As much as I think of the problem itself, I can’t pinpoint the problem in itself. There are many factors that arose to cause this situation and when I think about those causes, I find causes to those causes, and so on. No singular thing or cause is the cause of this problem since there are many factors. This proves to me the emptiness of the situation.

When this situation arose first last week, we began to think it was identity theft. The loan was taken out in 2009 on a car. But that raised more questions. The year is 2012 now. If it were identity theft, would I have not heard from the bank sooner for non-payments or such? Then when I learned from the collection agency that they may have my address and phone number by mistake, I began to feel like I was personally targeted and had to now prove my identity. Then I asked myself, “What is my self?” How can I feel attacked when there is no self to be attacked? Identity theft is a serious crime, and ruins credit and sometimes reputation – don’t get me wrong about that. But at the mere thought of it, once you remove the idea of self from the situation, what is left?

So once I applied the ideas of impermanence, emptiness and lack of inherent self to my situation, my suffering and anxiety about the situation decreased. I was able to think clearly and remove the “emotional” aspect of the situation. I can now speak calmly with the collection agency (after all they are just trying to do their job and earn a living) and the bank manager who is the go-between for me and the lending institution that issued the loan, in which those people are also trying to do their jobs.

It still frustrates me when I try to think about it logically, which sometimes there is no logic. Sometimes what we think is logical, actually is nothing more than ignorance based on what we think we know and how we perceive reality. Applying the Dharma to this situation has helped me become less emotionally involved which had cause me to suffer (and yes, I shed a few tears of frustration).

My situation isn’t over yet, since I’m waiting to hear back from the bank and have to call the collection agency to get more clarification. But the wheels are in motion. As long as I stay calm, kind, understanding and work with them to solve this problem, the better it will be for me and for the people working on this matter.

The next time you have a problem causing you lots of strife, just think about impermanence and emptiness to put it into perspective. Kindness can go very far and understanding even farther. Smile through adversity, or in the very least when it’s over, remember to smile again. In fact, you may find humour in it afterwards. In my situation, what are the odds that someone with the same name as me, getting a loan from the same group of banks as me, and they pick my address and phone number to collect? When I’m not upset, it’s funny! When you can laugh at it, that’s buddha nature when you see through the delusion, and ignorance, and understand that it’s impermanent and empty. Then you can smile, because you have the glimpse of enlightenment. Just a glimpse, but it’s a start to a life long journey.

Laughing Buddha – we all have buddha nature – we mustn’t forget our buddha laughter!

Don’t forget to smile and laugh every day. Problems will come and go everyday. Don’t overwhelm yourself with problems, they will always be there. Smile and enjoy the ride with the dharma wheel to support you. Namaste.